Chris Evans and Ana de Armas in a scene from ‘Ghosted’ | photo credit: Apple TV
Have you ever felt so mentally dead that you picture a miniature version of yourself dancing above your head to kill time? hollywood hotshots Chris Evans And ana de armas Dodge bullets and bad guys to retrieve a biological weapon inside a posh restaurant in the third act of this Dexter Fletcher directorial … while we choke on toxic pixie dust from a plasticky tale that’s mind-numbingly predictable comes out of writing.
chat gpt could have written a more interesting plot than this paleAnother excruciatingly dull action with lots of majesty – big stars, flashy cameos, gorgeous set pieces, and insane production values, enough to suffocate and make you look for the missing novelty.
after her stellar turn White, Ana de Armas receives an easy salary playing Sadie, a young, lonely woman who questions her career after the death of a co-worker. At a market, she visits a stall where freshly broken-hearted farmer Cole Turner (Evans) helps her choose a houseplant that hasn’t needed love for months. She is torn between a cactus that can die in days and a cactus that can live for weeks. She ultimately chooses the former, teasing Cole’s good conscience. An argument begins and dies down, but Cole sees some spark beneath all the tension; He asks her out and she agrees, and they go on a long date. It’s routine movie-meets-cute; Begins with sweet small talk about their different interests (here, horror movies) and ends with the two revealing personal traumas and bodies.
But it’s all awful enough. The dialogue doesn’t feel organic, and the two house plants on that stall would share better chemistry than Evans and Anna Day in these scenes.
Ghosted (English)
director: Dexter Fletcher
mold: Chris Evans, Ana de Armas, Adrien Brody, Mike Moh
Order: 117 minutes
Story: A farmer travels to London to surprise his one-year-old art curator crush, only to realize she is actually a CIA agent on a dangerous mission
The date does however harbor a certain duality; The film’s only morsel of anything resembling the real thing. Cole is old-school, affectionate and goofy-tough. Cold Sadie is just opening up to the warmth of human relationships. She can perform rock karaoke in front of a crowd, whereas she prefers to be alone. Sadie longs for a companion like a plant that can go months without water, and Cole is the opposite. The spot and color tone are either green or brown.
When Sadie doesn’t respond to his numerous messages (he waits for it, GHOSTED), it makes Romeo head to London – it’s better you don’t know how he discovered his current location – where, due to some unfortunate After events, Ko learns that she is a CIA agent working as an art curator (Guns and Roses? War and Peace? Get it). Now the trouble begins. Even its attempts at comedy fail so spectacularly, except for one scene featuring cameos from Evans’ Marvel colleagues, that it’s a 15-second filler of some old English cabbie picking Cole up from the airport. Yes, it looks like gold.
unfortunately, pale Takes itself too seriously, although it has all the right ingredients for a good spoof. The film unintentionally pokes fun at Adrien Brody playing the caricatured big boss baddie, LeVeque, who mistakenly believes Cole is his nemesis, an agent nicknamed Taxman (that’s Sadie). And yes, despite knowing these people and their mistaken identities, Sadie plans to ditch and dump Cole once she is “safe”.
But what can you expect from a movie that gives the Normie lead plot armor so big it could be seen from the Eiffel Tower? Apparently, Taxman knows a passcode to the weapon and so the villains want him alive, not dead, or “the bounty goes on their heads.” Yes! pale is a movie you should see if you’ve never been someone’s ghost, just to know how it feels. Sitting through this nasty fever dream can only make it easier for someone to get over it.
Ghosted is currently streaming on Apple TV+