SThe pending time can instill fear in many people, which is understandable. At the same time, the distinction between moments of solitude and loneliness is often misunderstood.
As a psychologist, I study solitude—the time we spend alone, not interacting with other people. I started this research ten years ago and by that time, Findings on young people’s time alone suggested that they often experience low mood when alone.
In social media, on television, or in the music we hear, we typically portray happiness as excitement, enthusiasm, and energy. From that perspective, solitude is often confused with loneliness.
In psychology, researchers define loneliness as a distressed emotion which we experience when we do not have the kind of social contact or connection, or are unable to receive, that we expect. solitude is different,
While people’s definitions of solitude may differ, what is interesting is that for many people being lonely Doesn’t mean there ain’t nobody else around, Instead, many people can and do find solace in public places, whether it’s sitting with a cup of tea in a busy cafe or reading a book in a park. And my research suggests that taking some time for yourself can have a positive effect on your daily mood.
Many of us have days when work is a hassle, when things don’t go as expected, or when we take on too much and feel overwhelmed. what i found is Learning to take some time for yourself, a moment of solitude, can help you deal with these feelings.
What can we gain from solitude?
one in series of experiments, I brought the graduate students into a room to sit quietly with me. In some studies, I took away the students’ bags and devices and asked them to sit with their thoughts; At other times, students stayed in the room with books or their phones.
After just 15 minutes of being alone, I found that any strong emotions the participants were feeling, such as anxiety or excitement, subsided. I concluded that solitude has the ability to reduce people’s arousal levels, which means it may be useful in situations where we feel frustrated, agitated, or angry.
This article is part of Quarter Life, a series about issues affecting those of us in our twenties and thirties. From the challenges of starting a career and looking after your mental health, to the excitement of starting a family, adopting a pet or just making friends as an adult. The articles in this series explore questions and bring answers as we navigate this turbulent period of life.
Many people may believe that only introverts can enjoy solitude. but while it is true introverts may prefer to be alonethey are not only people who can benefit from solitude.
In a poll of more than 18,000 adults around the world, more than half voted for solitude One of the main activities they engage in for leisure, So, if you’re an extrovert, don’t let that stop you from taking time for solitude to calm down.
it can be hard to sit with your thoughts
The challenging part of spending time alone is that it can be boring and lonely at times.
Many people find that sitting with their thoughts can be difficult, and they prefer to do something. In fact, forcing yourself to sit and do nothing can get you ahead. feeling alone time less enjoyable, So you may prefer to do some sort of activity in your moment of solitude.
In my study, I gave participants the option of doing nothing or spending their time sorting hundreds and hundreds of golf pencils into boxes. After being asked to be left alone for ten minutes, most participants opted to sort the pencils. This is the kind of activity I thought most people would find boring. However, the choice to do boring tasks stems from a desire to be busy when other people are not around to occupy our mental space.
So, it’s quite normal if you find yourself scrolling through your device every now and then for a few moments of solitude. Don’t be hard on yourself. lots of people scroll
To coping with stress and boredom, Some people prefer to spend their time alone doing everyday tasks, such as grocery shopping or doing laundry. This is legitimate alone time.
engaging in fun activities alone
However, it is interesting that many people shy away from participating in fun activities alone, such as going to the cinema or eating at a restaurant. This may be because we tend to think of them as activities we do with friends and close people, so doing them alone can make us feel judged and self-conscious, Traveling alone is another activity that can be intimidating, especially for women,
But an important advantage of going alone is the opportunity to be calm, and the freedom to choose what to do and how to do it.
In my time studying solitude, I’ve challenged myself to do some of these fun activities in my moments of solitude, and I’ve found the experience liberating. Other women have had similar experiences, especially while traveling, that have left them feeling empowered and free,
To overcome our fear of solitude, we need to recognize its benefits and see it as a positive option – Not something that happens to us. While traveling alone may be a little much for you right now, taking time out of your busy schedule for a small dose of solitude may be exactly what you need.
Thuy-vy NguyenAssistant Professor, Department of Psychology, Durham University
This article is republished from Conversation Under Creative Commons Licence. read the original article,
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